Issue November-26
 
In his Daily Telegraph article Paul Sullivan claims ten things the Germans do better than UK but doesn't realise he is putting the UK down with false information.

His article appeared in the Daily Telegraph on the 7th of August 2023.

It is not to say that maybe the Germans can do some things better, but this backdoor run-down of the UK is despicable.

We will dissect his info and base our opinion on over 40 years experience living and working all over Germany and not just in the Hauptstadt Berlin.

Geography:

Geography. Well  you don't actually DO geography do you. It exists and it was there even before the Germans were even a nation.

But let's see what he says:

From Berlin, Europe is literally at your feet. I can be in Prague in under five hours, Warsaw or Amsterdam in around six hours, Paris in eight hours, and Budapest within half a day. The trains usually have a dining car too, making the journey – along with a good book and some stellar views – a wonderful part of the travel experience.

From Berlin maybe, but from Hamburg or Flensburg. From our home in Northern Bavaria we can even beat that, but it is not something they do better. Unless of course you are trying to eek out every little advantage they may rightly or wrongly have. For us, the nearest salt water is Venice, Prague two hours away. If you spend your time travelling around great.

Trains with Dining car? Which trains? The ICE's (Intercities and some D-trains) but nowadays you are lucky if you get trolley service at extortionate prices. A warm ham baguette will set you back almost €7 which is a load more than you would pay in Subway or Gregs.

Train Travel:

So the book may have been made in Germany and it is true some views are quite pretty but nothing more than you could experience in the UK.

He doesn't mention the excellent service from the TH (Technisches Hilfswerk) in rescuing people from his wonderful trains when the air conditioning fails above 29° and they (Siemens) forgot to allow for any windows or hatches to be openable. Passengers were collapsing. But he could have praised the TH who are specialists when there are serious problems with people trapped in cars in snow blocked motorways, When trains fall off the tracks and heavy equipment is necessary to rescue passengers. Yes that is something they do well.

But how about a mention of the sub-standard concrete sleepers between Nuremberg and Munich which meant the the trains scheduled to reach 300kmh had to go slow for months and it screwed up all connecting inter-city connections. Oh and I almost forgot travelling at about 8mph in an intercity which had the conductor walking with a red flag because the signals had failed again on the same stretch but in this case going towards Nuremberg. It only took five hours I remember to do the one and a half hour journey. But they do that really well.

While we are about it how about some praise for Frankfurt Airport and the automatic walkways. Except if you incoming flight from London is more than five minutes late and you are not an olympic sprinter you will never make the connecting flight to Nuremberg. In the middle of the night a D-Zug instead of a flight, no dining car, no drinks and when you get to the airport you were intending to fly to there is nobody around for you to pay and get your car out of the car park.

What is really nice is what they call the "S"-Bahn. Those are local trains bringing people into the cities. One interesting fact are the number of court cases where people want compensation for never getting a seat they paid for. One might excuse this I suppose if you believe the Germans just like going to court? (actually it would seem they do).

But for years the S-Bahn in Hamburg was plagued by the argument should or should they not have guards in the evenings and at night? So they decide to save money by not having guards but then people are too frightened (didn't he say there was almost not crime and violence in his article) to travel and the revenue plummets. So back on with the guards until somebody new takes over in the finance department and decides they could save money by not having guards. A real yoyo effect.

Landscapes and nature:

Now how on earth can you credit people with their landscapes and nature?

We all know that beauty lies in the eye of the beholder. People who stay with me in Weymouth, particularly Germans, are overawed with the scenery. I personally grew up with it so it is nothing special to me and I do like the view of the Mountains from Munich but be realistic, anywhere even a tiny bit further north into Bavaria and there are no mountains. I would love to see the mountains the author was viewing from Berlin.

The weather tends to be better, too: warmer in summer, less rainy throughout the year, and colder in winter, which allows for more skiing and snow-themed opportunities. The countryside is also more accessible from German cities than British ones, thanks to a superior public transport system.

So, I learned to ski (short ski method) in Fichtelgebirge, just a few kilometres from Bayreuth. Only for the last ten years there is only one ski lift and it only operates if the nights have been cold enough for the the snow cannons to work. One place we used to go to for night-time skiing now uses wheeled go carts instead of skis.

In 1969 I can recall there was snow in Nuremberg from about the beginning of December and it lasted, if skiers were lucky) until easter. No more, that is a thing of the past. But of course you can't blame the Germans for that one.

Motorway driving

True the Germans have more motorways but presumably because they have more medium sizes towns which need to be connected. 

But how about quality and ease of driving. I travel regularly between the UK and Germany. 110 mph is my normal cruising speed in Germany. So France and Belgium it is a little slow, but very relaxed. Well lit up, well signed and for the most part few tailgaters and rowdies.

At Aachen this changes dramatically. Even at 100mph you need to constantly watch your rear view mirror for vehicles doing 120 or more. Then, particularly in bad weather the motorways are very badly illuminated, whereby I mean no cats eyes and only the white posts on the outside. The guardrail side doesn't have red cats eyes the way the French, Belgians and Dutch have. Only when I reach Norther Bavaria, actually Oberfranken, does this improve. Not a touch on the UK's cat's eyes. Of course cat's eyes are useless if there is snow lying and there the white posts every 50 metres are really good but as said only on one side so when there is a brow with a curve it can be really difficult to see how the road is going.

Rowdies? Masses of them. If you don't pull over fast enough then flashing and even tooting at you. Tailgating at 110 mph.

And not just on motorways. Courtesy: forget it. Survival of the fittest. Every German I know is amazed at how courteous, in general, we are in the UK. On slip roads running into major roads people in the UK will even ease back on the throttle to let you move across. No way in Germany. I was here first and you are going to wait

Public transport and cycling:

While they’re not quite Amsterdam or Copenhagen, German cities have very decent infrastructure for getting around without a car. Even here in the German capital it’s entirely possible to navigate the city via the excellent bus, tram and train connections. These are supplemented by a cycle-path network that has been slowly but surely improving in recent years. Local and long-distance trains also have dedicated bike carriages that enable a mix of cycling and public transport.

My wife tells me this is only partially true. Even buying a ticket is overcomplicated but the same may be true in London or other UK cities.

What the Germans don't have though are the free bus passes for the elderly. My German friends can hardly believe it. "What you don't have to pay if you are over 65?". And believe it or not that is almost 20% of the population. OK. You can't travel before 9:30 rush hour but surely that is not such a big deal. This too is something WE DO not something god given like mountains.

Now I am going to praise them. It is a small thing and I admit I am not sure how wide spread this is.

We live in a village about 10 miles from the city of Bayreuth. When I first went there, there was a bus service which meant a 40 seater running every hour almost empty. Except maybe in the morning. So what do you do if the service is not being used? Cancel the busses?

No, they came up with the idea of "Linien Taxis". No busses just taxis. But they only run on demand and you can only get on and off where the bus stops are. Also they only run to the bus timetable and of course only when they have been booked. You need to call a half hour before it is scheduled to run to book your seat. You pay the same fare as you would on the bus. They save money and still provide a reasonable service. Even though they are only allowed to stop at the bus stops, my daughter stated that when she was the last passenger and our home was at the end of the line, the driver would stop at our house and wait to see that she was safely through the garden gate.

That is super cool.

Crime and safety:

Without wanting to paint the UK as a 'Lord of the Flies'-type island full of constant drunken brawls, there is a discernible contrast in terms of aggressive, hostile or violent public behaviour. It sounds extraordinary to say this but in the 15 years I have been here I have never witnessed a fight, whether on the streets or inside a bar. Much of this has to do with alcohol consumption of course – Germans love a drink too, but their propensity to go overboard is way, way lower. Anti-social behaviour is also more frowned upon here and the European Crime Index lists Germany as

 
   
 
 
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